lolita express (12. 619)

Half-way into Russian-American author Vladimir Nabokov’s 1955 novel, narrator Humbert Humbert, recounting his obsession, victimisation and eventual kidnapping of a twelve-year old girl after becoming her step-father, pens a poetical classified:

Wanted, wanted: Dolores Haze.
Hair: brown. Lips: scarlet.
Age: five thousand and three hundred days
Profession: None, or Starlet.

Where are you hiding, Dolores Haze?
Why are you hiding, darling?
(I talk in a daze, I walk in a maze,
I cannot get out, said the starling).

Where are you riding, Dolores Haze?
What make is the magic carpet?
Is a Cream Cougar the present craze?
And where are you parked, my car pet?

Who is your hero, Dolores Haze?
Still one of those blue-caped star-men?
Oh the balmy days and the palmy bays,
And the cars, and the bars, my Carmen!

Oh Dolores, that juke-box hurts!
Are you still dancin’, darlin’?
(Both in worn Levis, both in torn T-shirts,
And I, in my corner, snarlin’).

Happy, happy is gnarled McFate
Touring the States with a child wife,
Plowing his Molly in every State
Among the protected wild life.

My Dolly, my folly! Her eyes were vair,
And never closed when I kissed her.
Know an old perfume called Soleil Vert?
Are you from Paris, mister?

L'autre soir un air froid d’opéra m’alita;
Son félé—bien fol est qui sy fie!
Il neige, le décor s’écroule, Lolita!
Lolita, qu’ai-je fait de ta vie?

Dying, dying, Lolita Haze,
Of hate and remorse, I'm dying.
And again my hairy fist I raise,
And again I hear you crying.

Officer, officer, there they go—
In the rain, where that lighted store is!
And her socks are white, and I love her so,
And her name is Haze, Dolores.

Officer, officer, there they are—
Dolores Haze and her lover!
Whip out your gun and follow that car.
Now tumble out, and take cover.

Wanted, wanted: Dolores Haze.
Her dream-gray gaze never flinches.
Ninety pounds is all she weighs
With a height of sixty inches.

My car is limping, Dolores Haze,
And the last long lap is the hardest,
And I shall be dumped where the weed decays,
And the rest is rust and stardust.

The fragrance mentioned in the seventh stanza Soleil vert (Green Sun) is a fictional perfume but is also the French title of the 1966 novel Make Room! Make Room! and the cinematic adaptation of Soylent Green set in the year 2022 (close), in possibly another authoritarian manoeuvre to normalisation and acceptance—after all Romeo and Juliet were underage. I suspect that Nabokov did not suspect that his work would, unironically, become such an American cultural touchstone, ignoring the observations on culture and becoming the same monster of incuriosity as the protagonist, sanitised and made family-friendly like what may be yet to come.

8x8 (12. 618)

eight limes, no more: a list is a map, a compass, a prayer—via MetaFilter  

ключевская сопка: volcanic eruption in Russia’s far east sets off earthquake and tsunami warnings  

windrunner: turbine manufacturer—in defiance of Trump’s claim that windmills are killing us—building world’s largest aircraft (see also) to transport huge blades to remote wind-farms  

foredone: useless etymology and some very cromulent words

twin primes: pairs that only are separated by an even number in between grow rarer as one looks at greater ranges of values but no one knows if they run out altogether  

evrópusambandið: Iceland considering resuming accession talks with the supranational body  

this guy is taking people from the spa: Trump reveals to press-pool that falling out with Epstein was over him stealing staff  

an oral history of atlantis: a conversation about metafiction with author Ed Park

made man (12. 617)

On this day, at some time after 15:00 local time, James “Jimmy” Riddle Hoffa, American labour activist and president of the International Brotherhood of Teamsters, disappeared under mysterious circumstances in Bloomfield Township, Michigan—a suburb of Detroit. Involved with organised crime and the Mafia since his early years working with the union, making accommodations and compromises with gangsters that often controlled trucking and warehouse guilds through the 1930s in order to leverage strength in numbers and consolidate disparate associations for collective bargaining, though the influence of the Mafia increased as membership grew.

Various allegations of bribery, fraud and corruption cast a pall over his tenure from 1957 through his 1963 indictment for jury tampering, prosecuted by Attorney General Robert F Kennedy. Despite harsh sentencing, Hoffa was reelected to a third term as the Teamsters’ president, resigning from office in 1971 while still in prison as a condition of a presidential pardon, Nixon commuting his sentence of thirteen years to time served, less than five, pledging not to engage with any labour organisation for a period of nine years. The unions endorsed Nixon’s 1972 reelection bid, breaking with tradition of supporting the Democratic candidate. By the following year, Hoffa sought to return to union leadership and unsuccessfully sued the administration to invalidate those restrictions, and undeterred planned to regain his role—despite his parole and vocal opposition from dons and caporegimes of prominent criminal syndicates. Hoffa had arranged a meeting on the afternoon of 30 July at the Machus Red Fox restaurant, venue of his son’s wedding reception, in order to make peace with two of those Mafia families. Hoffa was stood up however when none showed at the appointed time, documented by a call home from a payphone, and friends found his unlocked car in the restaurant’s parking lot early the next morning. Extensive searches, surveillance and depositions yielded no leads, and Hoffa was declared legally deceased by a judge on the anniversary of his disappearance in 1982 with no individuals charged. Not infrequent excavations in the Detroit area and perennial indulges from The Irishman to Bruce Almighty sustain the mystery and haunt America’s attitudes toward the labour movement and unions to this day.

synchronoptica

one year ago: assorted links worth revisiting (with synchronopticæ) plus Monty Hall enlightenment 

twelve years ago: sci-fi author Hugo Gernsbach

fourteen years ago: a trip to Aquitaine and Medoc 

fifteen years ago: metamorphoses plus Big Tech’s partnership with spy agencies

mama appelsap (12. 616)

Delving the depths of Wikipedia, we learn that in Dutch, with a much more contemporary and relatable mishearing than the seventeenth century Scottish ballad The Bonnie Earl o’ Moray (see previously), the concept of mondegreen is customarily referred to as the above, “Mommy apple juice,” from the 1982 Michael Jackson song Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’ with the lyrics “Mama-se mama-sa ma-ma-coo-sa”—popularised by a long-running radio call-in segment where listeners were encouraged to contribute their own misheard music under that name. More formally referred to auditieve pareidolia, the Jackson song’s coda is sampled from Cameroonian saxophonist Manu Dibango’s 1972 disco hit hit “Soul Makossa,” whom later sued for a monetary settlement for copyright infringement. Although I am disinclined to believe the prevalence of the name—it sounds like something I would make up in my head, the Wikipedia goes on to inform that in Germany mondegreens are informally called Agathe Bauers—misinterpreting the refrain from the song from Snap!

handelsbilanz (12. 615)

Aside from getting an ostensibly raw and lopsided tariff deal out of Trump—though far from finalised and terms and conditions could always change—using trade as foreign policy tool, a particularly blunt and inappropriate instrument as Trump as done in order to bypass more traditional channels, the EU’s capitulation has proved to be not only a disappointment among academics and the press but also leaders and is representing a split in solidarity in the already fractious bloc, with many regarding the submission as a concession to German industry at the expense of the agricultural and pharmaceutical sectors. The onerous commitment riding on the deal to purchase over a trillion dollars in US energy and weapons is an assurance that Brussels can not compel members to do—so there’s that Ausfahrt, and moreover very little of these burgeoning conflicts address the consumers’ role in the opening of markets, who do indeed collectively punch their own weight—with the notable exception of Canada, also under threat of annexation. Flooded with cheaper, lower quality American goods, shoppers can still choose to boycott them and retailers will no longer stock them. Individuals can also forgo an albeit more entrenched and harder to avoid US dominance on financial and internet services—which for the American rentier economy—would send an even bigger message though a bit of inconvenience and creative work-arounds, refraining from using credit cards and payment clearing houses and American internet companies.

synchronoptica

one year ago: JD Vance’s sofa memoirs (with synchronopticæ), nobody reads ads, twirling towards freedom, a phoney controversy over the Olympics opening ceremony plus Friday Night Videos (1983)

twelve years ago: derivative blockbusters, stormy weather plus a visit to Gelnhausen

fifteen years ago: smoking ban in Bavaria plus word clouds as CVs

8x8 (12. 614)

ieepa: class action lawsuit from small businesses affected by Trump’s tariffs could prove to be a significant challenge to his economic model 

lambretta boogaloo: a new single from Big Boss Man Los Res and the Bongo Fuzz label   

geodesy: astronomers triangulate Earth’s location in the Universe using black holes but WiFi is interrupting the signal  

at most ten-percent syncopation: Nazi era rules for jazz musicians—via Nag on the Lake  

aldeh: Greater Manchester chain keeping temporary name in honour of Oasis reunion tour after attaining status as cultural landmark  

sing what happens: a sedately risqué Japanese karaoke televised game show—via Memo of the Air 

tas: Strange New Worlds to have a fully Muppetised episode courtesy of Jim Henson’s Creature Workshop—still, cancel Paramount 

church and state: US to allow federal workers to evangelise in the work place

tilting at windmills (12. 613)

Although failing to secure a ten percent flat tariff on European as the UK had reached—despite Brussels’ belief it could achieve the same nuisance levy—and following the capitulation of NATO members to increase defence-spending to five percent of their domestic output with commitments to purchase US armaments as well as American fossil fuels, the EU’s very asymmetrical appeasement of Trump is seemingly not to win a trade war, the terms keep shifting and preciously little surety has been accomplished with questions remaining on pharmaceuticals, steel and the tech and financial services hegemony. This undignified negotiation seems only to privilege German manufacturing above, though markets are open to cheaper US imports, accepted without pushback avoids more escalation—one should stay up to bullies however, particularly when there’s no substance nor compulsion behind his policies and posture, but maybe to suffer humiliation in order to preserve the global order is a small price to pay—economically the announcement affects little in the end other than temporarily enriching the petrostate and weapons manufacturers with the commitments—and Trump has already significantly advanced his deadline for new Russian sanctions and is showing daylight between himself and Netanyahu. Such men, small and common, cannot be trusted or invested with such sweeping powers, however.  They’re killing the beauty of our scenery—our plains, and I’m not talking about airplanes—they won’t let you bury the propellers.

synchronoptica

one year ago: a history of Elvis-officiated weddings (with synchronopticæ)

fifteen years ago: contentious Olympic venues and the keyholders of the internet 

poisoning pigeons in the park (12. 612)

Language Log directs our attention to the obituary and encomium of the recently departed satirist noted for his nimble lyrics and insufferably cheerful accompaniment with a decidedly dark streak, Tom Lehrer (1928 - 2025)—dropping the act in the 1960s but going on to teach mathematics and musical theatre and was a regularly contributor of political lampoons for That Was the Week that Was and an inspiration for Randy Newman, Dr Demento and “Weird Al.” Relinquishing all copy- and performance-rights of his songs in 2022, Lehrer’s music is in the public domain and probably best known for his “Elements”—itself often repurposed for any given subject, set to the tune of Pirates of Penzance and the particularly maudlin “We Will All Go Together When We Go” about universal bereavement—an inspired achievement should someone drop the bomb. In keeping with the Log’s mission, here’s an orthographic track produced for The Electric Company. Much more at the links above.